Much Ado About Lothi
by mingyo03
Summary: What! It couldn't be, could she? No, just no! He was going mad, talking to himself. (Otherwise known as observing Éomer's denial, a cross with Much Ado About Nothing.)


Éomer King of Rohan was taking a walk in the gardens of Prince Imrahil's home when he first heard the shout.

"What?! "

"I mean it! I'm being serious here!"

"You must be jesting, that's just beyond crazy-"

Spoting the two younger princes and his captain of the guard together, he stopped midstride and snuck behind a bush. They didn't seem to have noticed him, and he sensed the nature of their talk was supposed to be secretive, as this part of the garden was a secluded place where anyone rarely came. (Well, save for him.)

Éomer snorted in bemusement at his predicament. Here he was, the king of Riddermark, spying on his friends like some teenage girl. Why on earth did he come here anyway?

He had visited his sister and Faramir in Ithilien, where he met Imrahil and his offspring again. His older friend invited him to Dol Amroth and with Éowyn pressuring him to go and relax for a while, he had no choice but to accept. Really, no one could deny Éowyn of what she wanted, least of all Éomer himself. She knew all of his childhood scrapes and his aquired kingly majestic tones had no effect on her except making her snort. He had great admiration for Faramir, who was the only man that could even remotely control her wild actions. One day he _**would**_ get some advice from the steward on that, he vowed.

He had come out to the garden from the banquet Imrahil was holding in his honour. He was truly grateful for Imrahil having gone to so much trouble for him, but that didn't mean he had to like it. Lords with unmarried daughters coming up to him endlessly, said daughters too tongue-tied to talk to him or brazenly trying to seduce him, low necklines and tight fitting bodices and all.

(Éomer shuddered. _No man should be sentenced to such torture._ )

It didn't help that his supposed best friend and captain of his guard was sitting back lazily and enjoying his discomfort immensely. After a particularly shameless one Lady Rialean had tried to get him to feel her up during a dance, he escaped to where Éothain was drinking some wine.

"Captain," he said with gritted teeth.

"Yes, O Éomer King?" was his reply, which only convinced Éomer that Éothain was reveling in seeing him suffer.

"Isn't the captain of my guard supposed to protect me from danger?"

"My lord, I see nothing but lovely ladies whom you had the honour to make an aquaintance. What is this danger you speak of?"

" _Oh Bema_ , I don't have the patience right now to play along, you know exactly what I'm talking about!"

The people near them became quiet, their attention on the King of Rohan and his captain of the guard apparently having a disagreement. Éomer lowered his voice and said

"You shield me from Lady Rialean, and I escape through the back door, _is that clear_?"

Éothain merely grinned and drained his glass, then went to said lady who was hovering around Éomer like an eagle circles its prey. As Éomer hastily made his escape, he caught **a certain princess** looking at him, grinning in a way not unlike Éothain had. Fighting the urge to verbally spar with her, he quietly snuck out to the back garden. He had wondered into the more secluded groves, wondering around with no clear direction. Then when at last he decided to turn back, he saw three figures blurry from the dark, but it was not hard to distinguish them, as they were making an incredibly large racket. Erchirion, Amrothos, and Éothain.

"I swear to Manwe's balls, I'm telling the truth!" "Clearly you had too much wine, brother."

Amrothos scoffed, shaking his head at his older brother. "I'm sorry, but there's no bloody way you can convince me that Lothiriel is in _**love**_ with Éomer!"

Éomer stumbled fom the bush he was hiding as he lost his footing.

 _Wait, what?_

 _ **What?!!**_

Erchirion tried again, saying "Oh and _who's_ the one that almost fainted in a drinking match with Élfhelm just now? I mean it, she's got it bad for him." "And _how_ _in Arda_ ," said Éothain raising his eyebrows, "do you know of this love you claim that the princess has for my king?"

"I overheard Lothi talking to Merilwen at her room. I went there to ask her for some salve for sunburn and there she was, pouring her heart out."

"Merilwen? _Really_? I mean, she's nice and all but she's not what you'd call a kindred spirit like our Lothi is, and they clashed more than several times regaring Lothi's propriety. She might have just as been taking the mickey out of her pretending to like Éomer!" "Oh don't be so judgemental. Merilwen was always more of a mother figure to her than a sister-in-law, and don't forget the time she and Lothi went to the festival at night on their own!" "Lady Merilwen did _what_?!"

Éomer could imagine Éothain's incredulous expression. Come to think of it, he was surprised too. Lady Merilwen was Elphir's wife, and a rather prim and proper Gondorian lady. He remembered the lady giving Lothiriel the evil eye when she was particularly rude to him. Not only was this aforementioned reckless action not in her nature, but Elphir must have been mad with anger and fright. Elphir, the only married child of Imrahil was a very family man, and had an overly protective streak. Éomer remembered Elphir looking at pictures of his wife and son before marching into battle. What on earth had driven the lady to take such a course of action?

Echoing his sentiments, Éothain asked Amrothos. "Why did she do a thing like that? The princes, I understand," (Erchirion and Amrothos snorted, as did Éomer though no one could hear him.) "but lady Merilwen?"

Amrothos sniggered. "Aye, she had a spat with Elphir about him being too overly protective-"

"And coming from her, that means a lot!" interrupted Erchirion.

"-and she went to Lothi to plan her adventure."

Éothain chuckled. "The princess must have been overjoyed to see her asking to come on a mischief rather than preventing it for once."

Erchirion seemed to come back to focus.

"Anyway, I know my sister and she was in earnest. I think she even cried because I'm sure I heard sniffling."

Éomer's eye bulged out. _Lothiriel? **Crying?**_ During his aquaintance with his ever annoying enemy, he had never seen her crying. It was perposterous! Surely Erchirion had too much wine!

Amrothos looked at his brother incredulously.

"Are you for real? Lothiriel, our Lothi cried because of Éomer?!"

"Say you did hear the princess crying. But she likes Éomer? You **DO** remember _she hates his being_ , right? I can even quote it from memory; "I want nothing to do with that arrogant ass of a king!!". And now you're telling me she loves him??"

That was a speech Éomer would never forget. The first time the two had met, was not at a celebratory ball, but at the Houses of Healing, where Lothiriel was helping the healers. Granted, he was a bit rude to her when he thought she was a serving girl, but that doesn't make her wrongs right, thought Éomer grimly. After his initial shock at finding out the insolent serving girl was in fact the only daughter of one of his most trusted friends, he had tried to make amends. But she seemed to have her mind set on hating him.

On one such instance, they were bickering so loudly that Amrothos jokingly commented they fight like an old married couple, and they both blanched. That's when the princess shouted out her sentiments about his ass, and Imrahil had come over to her red faced, and gave her a scolding.

 _Thank Eru_ that there were only close friends in that gathering!

Éomer still remembered Éothain staring at Lothiriel in awe, which earned him a smack in the head from Éomer. Unfortunately, after that Éothain and Lothiriel hit it off and they were practically identical twins when it came to annoying him. Éothain did it out of good humour, but Lothiriel did it because she hated him(as she had told him on many occasions).

"There's a fine line between love and hate, my friend." said Erchirion.

"Yes, but Lothi wouldn't cross that line, she's too stubborn." commented Amrothos.

"Look here, I'm telling the honest to god truth!!" shouted Erchirion, exasperated. All three turned back to check if anyone had come out to check what the commotion was. Éomer sprinted silently to a nearer bush to listen more closely.

"I have no idea what it is but there seems to be some sort of weird attraction she feels for Éomer. But she can't tell him that now, can she? Apparently it's a hate-love relationship for her, but the love is winning out!"

"But _Lothi? and_ Éomer?" said Amrothos dubiously. "I mean, we _are_ talking about our sister who rode off with Firefoot for a whole afternoon and made Éomer go mental, right?"

"I'm sure she did it for love-"

"Well if _that's_ love I shudder to think what she would do to her future lover." interrupted Éothain. "I had to bear the brunt of his outrage that whole afternoon!!"

"Maybe she thought making friends with Firefoot would make Éomer see her in a different light. Who knows the mind of a woman? All I know is that she loves him! Don't you remember the masked ball where Lothi pretended not to know who Éomer was? She acted like she thought he was a common rider and insulted Éomer all night to his face!"

"Oh yeah that was hilarious." grinned Éothain.

He knew that she knew it was him all along?!

Éomer was going to _**kill**_ the three younger offsprings of the prince and Éothain too while he was at it.

"But that was just typical Lothi having fun with poor ol' Éomer."

"Didn't you notice that all the other ladies couldn't come near him because of her? I know for a fact the pack of unmarried Gondorian ladies were looking for a way to snare Éomer into marriage. But her taking the mickey out of him made him so mad that he could think of nothing but her! Now _that's_ a mastermind scheme if I ever saw one!"

Lothiriel? No, not she… could she? Why was his heart beating fast like the drums?

"Wait, you're actually _serious_ , aren't you?" said Éothain, looking as if he started to believe him.

"Yes of course I'm serious!! Where have you been these few minutes?" snorted Erchirion.

"Good Elbereth, my crazy little sister is in love with Éomer? This is just too good!" Amothos guffawed.

"Is she going to profess her love to him?" said Éothain eagerly.

No, no! Éomer's mind went into a frantic frenzy where his inner voice shouted out all sorts of suggestions on what to do if Lothiriel did just that.

He lost the conversations for a few moments. "-like she would. We all know Éomer hates Lothiriel. He think she's too flighty and fun-loving. I think that's why she was crying."

What? Suddenly Éomer felt very guilty. The princess was more than just a flighty girl, she did help out in the Houses of Healing after the battle of Pelennor.

"Personally, I don't know why he wouldn't love her back. She's beautiful, and has a good sense of humour, and an excellent horsewoman. Father had to turn down five suitors just this month!" shrugged Amrothos.

 _There were **five** suitors when she was only 19?!! _Éomer suddenly felt a surge of protectiveness for the princess. Who knows what those scums wanted, claiming a Gondorian princess for their own.

"But anyone who has seen these two together doesn't pay suit to the princess for fear of offending Éomer, right? _Oh Bema_ , I bet he's driving her suitors away because of the ill feelings between them!" shouted a very excited Éothain.

"Even _I'm_ afraid to be around the two of them and I'm her brother." Amrothos agreed.

"So what are we waiting for? We should just tell him and get it over with-"

" _Stop, stop_. If Lothi learns we told him and that he knows it she'll kill him first and torture us forever. I do not want to be subjected to her subtle torture in everyday life like the time I tossed her favorite doll into the sea."

"He's right, Éomer would have too much fun mocking her and I wouldn't wish that on Lothi. Don't tell him Éothain."

"Aw too bad. It would make my day to see Éomer's face when I tell him."

"That is a major pro." grinned Amrothos.

" _Eothain!! Roth!_ "

"All right, all right your highness. I, Éothain of Rohan solemnly swear not to tell Éomer king however tempting it is." Erchirion rolled his eyes.

"We should be going in anyway, father will be looking for us."

With that, the trio trudged back to the ball room, leaving Éomer alone with his confused thoughts.

Lothiriel hated him and that was a fact, what the hell did Erchirion know?

Though… She always looked mad when he payed attention to other beautiful ladies (he couldn't help it, it was just male instincts!), and engaged him in a verbal sparring, claiming she was saving those lovely ladies from a perv(it was not his fault they wore dresses with low necklines!!) and an arrogant king. She couldn't have been jealous, right? _**Right**_??

She was sort of beautiful when she laughed after whatever mischief she pulled(usually at him), her _**dark hair**_ billowing around her and those _**red lips**_ …

 _Oh Bema_ , _what was he doing, talking to himself?_ Erchirion must have been playing an elaborate joke on him.

Just then, he spotted another figure coming out of the back door. Someone with graceful light steps, tall stature and _long black tresses_.

 _ **Damn, it was Lothiriel!**_

 _Don't Panic!_

 ** _Panic!!_ **Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!

"Éomer King!" shouted Lothiriel, a reluctant expression on her face.

"Y, yes?" answered Éomer coming out of the bush he had been hiding in.

Lothiriel stared at the king of Rohan who had dirt on his clothes and a leaf or two in his blonde head. Then she shrugged it off.

"I was forced here against my will, but I was sent to tell you that my father is looking for you."

"Oh, um, thank you. I'll, uh, just be there in a moment."

She looked at him as if he had sprouted another head. He smiled weakly at her.

Lothiriel turned away shaking her head and went in.

Éomer stared after her. _There must have been a double meaning in her words!!_

Back at the ballroom, the trio ran up eagerly to the balcony.

"Oh Bema, that was the best fun I had since forever!" guffawed Éothain, tears of mirth streaming down his face.

"If _**that**_ doesn't get him to admit he's head over heels for her, he's hopeless." grinned Erchirion.

"Look, there's Lothi talking to him. Did he just crawl out of a bush in front of her?! This is just too hilarious!" crowed Amrothos.

"The princess is going in again. Do my eyes deceive me or is he grinning like a madman?"

"We ought to be called the best matchmakers in all of Arda if we got Éomer to love Lothiriel! Gentleman, our work here is done!" declared Erchirion.

And they promptly cackled like mad, rolling around clutching their aching bellies, and that was how they were found by a very bewildered Imrahil a few moments later.


End file.
